After reading the most recent, perhaps unsurprisingly flatulent, confused and rambling Marxist/humanist drivel, cunningly dressed up as theology, emanating from the over zealously bearded mouth of that utterly deranged and confused paganDruidic lunatic who is presently masquerading as our Archbishop of Canterbury, the following parodic scene leapt immediately into my mind:
The Archbishop: Good morning my fellow brethwomen of the eternal psychosexual flux. What a glorious day to be alive as we come together to “just do it” for Jesus. We are gathered here today to pay homage to the Glorious Green of all creation, embracing the great mission before us in the faithful service of eternal uniformity and oneness with the spirit.
The Archbishop: Ohhhhhhm. Bring forth the gong that we may summon forth the voice of the tantric void to bless our gathering. Yet light not the incense lest we be damned to another cycle on the wheel for earth Karma crimes.
<A gong sounds>
General Synod: Hallelujah, Gaia uber Alles!
The Archbishop (singing): The Lord is here, there and anywhere according to each and everyone’s individual and non specific cultural needs.
General Synod (response): His spirit is with us, them and everyone else, wherever they may be in time or space or doctrinal orientation.
The Archbishop: Lift up your hearts (or maybe any other bodily organ that may serve the Holy Green just as well).
General Synod (response): We lift them to The Green.
The Archbishop (singing): Let us give thanks to the Green our God.
General Synod (singing): It is right (or wrong or perhaps neither) to give thanks and Praise!
The Archbishop: Heavenly androgeny . Through the ephemeral mists of time and spoke to us through your prophets - Care for my creation you charged us. Fail not to punish those who sin and transgress against your Holy Green, master of all creation. Spare not the heretics, the deniers, the infidels who deny your laws and your truth.
Our Gaia, who art of nature
Hallowe’d be thy name
Thy garden come
Thy climate be calm
On earth, as it is in Green
Give us this day our daily carbon allowance
And forgive us our carbon debits
As we forgive those whose carbon usage exceeds ours
Lead us not into gestation
But deliver us from sanity
For thine is the spirit, The Green and the Power, now and forever
The Archbishop: Blessed are you my children. Go forth in the spirit of diversity and linguistic hyperbole, to love and serve the utterly banal and faceless conformity that is sweeping this world away and bringing forth The Green once again in its glorious wake.
Quite clearly, the Church of England, with every passing day it remains led by this doctrinally, philosophically and theologically bankrupt maniac, is on the verge of total collapse. Just over a week ago, we lost yet another “conservative” (virtually a dirty word these days thanks to dodgy Dave and his flirtations with behaviourist economic policies) Bishop who dared to stick to traditional Biblical teaching and serve his flock according to his conscience, and quite clearly and with no serious rational possibility of debate, according to the received word of God.
How many more good men are we going to lose before this Church dissolves itself into the apostate dustbin of history along with the Marxist/Communist gang of thugs to whom this blighted institution owes its fiduciary and political existence? Around the nation, in the name of the rampaging shibboleths of “racial and sexual equality”, stoic and uncompromising upholders of Christian teaching and morals are being replaced with trendy lefty Marxist/Feminist fuzzywuzzies, who care nothing for Biblical truth, and just want to be liked and accepted in their newly normalized status as incompetent trustees of Christian England.
Well now, a word of advice to you ladies of the cloth - be careful what you wish for.
The real and very serious Christian men of this Island are waking up to the agenda and machinations of your global Common Purpose, you will have nowhere to hide, and we will pursue you in public and spare no quarter in exposing your works of darkness for all to see.
And as for you Dr Williams, the sooner you disappear into the deep and hoary woods to commune with whatever ancientspirits and runes that have infected your befuddled mind, the better for all of us. Begone from our Church and national life before the wrath of our Lord burns you to the core and hurls you into the pit to be with your true Lord and master.